"Hear's the scoop"

If you're reading this blog, it's probably likely you have hearing loss or maybe you're looking for information for someone you love who is hard of hearing (HoH) or you're a friend of mine and I thank you. I am a 30 year old woman, I am a registered nurse, and I have sensorineural hearing loss. I was born with my hearing loss, but it wasn't discovered until I was a few years old. My parents had to convince the doctors I wasn't hearing! I've worn hearing aids since I was 5 and was put through speech therapy when I was in pre-school and kindergarten. My mom said she wishes she would have recorded my speech before therapy since I pronounced words as I heard them and not as they should have been spoken. With lip reading skills and speech therapy and hearing aids, I was able to participate in the "normal" hearing world. I went to public school and graduated in the top 15 students of my 150+ high school class. I was a cheerleader and varsity soccer player. I participated in drama (had the lead role for two plays) and decided on becoming a nurse. Even though I went through my 30 years of life so far as normally as I could, I still had days that were hard to get by. I struggled with group participation at times, and often missed out on crucial points in movies or discussions by not understanding the dialogue or just tagged along on the sidelines at concerts, pretending I knew the words to all the songs. Music was great, but I knew I wasn't hearing all the different instruments that make up the layers of the song. Sometimes it just sounded like a mash of noise to me. Many times I would be frustrated to the point of tears and disappointment of not being able to hear everything clearly and quite often I was too embarrassed to explain
to people that I am HoH and wear hearing aids and could you please look at me when you talk
and speak up a little. I found that if I told people that, the majority spoke to me as if I were slow or dumb. Hearing loss can affect one's learning ability, but it definately isn't an intelligence issue! Now I'm much more secure in who I am and I don't really care what people think about my hearing loss. But as a girl growing up, self esteem issues were huge! I struggled with dating (and really, what teen doesn't already!) due to my hearing loss and the image my hearing aids projected. I was shy and unsure of myself around new people, but those whom I knew from early days and understood my disability I was more comfortable with. But even though I knew they were accepting of me and my hearing aids, it was still hard to feel totally normal. I couldn't participate in late night quiet talks after bedtime with my girl friends because it was too hard to hear the whispers. I always struggled to hear the TV at friends houses because they listened at normal volumes whereas I needed it loud. They always usually made sure I could hear it too, and even when I couldn't I just nodded yes so it wouldn't be a noise nuisance. Wearing hearing aids as a kid and teenager (and for some adults) is definately a social stigma issue. I always wore mine because I wanted to hear so as not to miss out on anything, but I've lost a hearing aid or two. One time that stands out is when I was at an amusement park and wanted to ride a roller coaster. I was too embarrassed to take my aids out in front of my boyfriend at the time, even though the sign clearly said "No loose articles should be worn on ride, including hearing aids, etc". Needless to say, one of my hearing aids flew out of my ear on a particularily hair pin turn that banged our heads against the roll bars and that ruined the day and we broke up because I refused to talk to him after that for fear of not hearing him and having to explain why, or answer something that is completely off the wall to what he actually said! I imagine that for a 16 year old boy, having your girlfriend refusing to speak to you when things were going so well before would be confusing! What's sad is, I never stopped to consider that he probably knew I wore the hearing aids and was just fine with it, because now that boy is my husband! But that's another blog...

That's just a glimpse of my hearing background. I functioned through life just fine with the hearing aids and was happy enough that I could hear with them, but was always frustrated with how they sounded and felt, having to take them out to sleep, shower, ride roller coasters, or swim and play in the water. I always felt isolated and at a disadvantage because of that. I always felt in my heart there must be something better out there. Something scientists and doctors can come up with to help the HoH to hear without a hearing aid. Then I was researching the internet one day for assistance with hearing and came across middle ear implants, specifically the Envoy Medical Esteem middle ear implant. A completely internal (aka invisible) hearing device that restores hearing to a much more normal sound and quality than a hearing aid. I started to cry a little (truthfully I flipped out) when I looked into this more as I realized that I could potentially hear normally just like my husband and my mom and dad and my best friend! Maybe I wouldn't have to struggle at work to hear a doctor's verbal order, I dreamed that I could hold whispered conversations with my husband at night, and that I could lay out on the beach and swim and hear!

I contacted Envoy through email for some information not really knowing what I was looking for and what resulted was the start of an incredible path to the "normal" hearing world. I am not deaf, but I do struggle everyday with hearing correctly and trying not to make "what?" and "huh?" my most commonly used words. Envoy has given me a quality of life I only dreamed of and it's only going to get better! I will back track in the upcoming posts to bring this story up to date with what is currently happening with my hearing and the surgery that changed it for the better! So "hear's the scoop";) Follow along if you want to relate to me and please, spread the word about Envoy Medical and their hearing implant, the Esteem. (www.envoymedical.com)

***I am not affiliated with Envoy in any way except as a very grateful recipient of the Esteem device. This blog is only meant to help connect others who might be searching for help and info on hearing better and is not meant to diagnose or solicit in any way. Someday I hope to convince insurance companies to insure hearing devices for those of us who are HoH and want to live as normally as we can. Hearing aids and hearing surgeries are not cosmetic, they are functional and a requirement to socialize and hold a job. I could not be a nurse without hearing properly. I don't know many occupations that you could work in without hearing. Hearing aids, maintenance and care, and the surgeries to restore hearing are expensive. Hopefully with enough awareness, and the amazing research and work that Envoy and other hearing device companies have put into new technology, zero coverage for hearing will be a thing of the past!***